Understanding Queerplatonic Relationships
- Pranati Chavali
- Feb 14
- 2 min read
Updated: Mar 5
We are all familiar with platonic and romantic relationships. They dominate our thoughts when we try to define a connection we have with someone (nevermind the situationship). However, this Valentine’s Day could be perfect to get to know another, special kind of bond – the queerplatonic one!
What are queerplatonic relationships?
These are the kinds of relationships built on deep, intense emotional bonds. Some may choose to call it “love”, and others may want to keep it labelled as “feelings”. They do not necessarily involve sexual intimacy or romantic feelings, but the emotions concerned cannot be pushed into the box that has “platonic” scribbled on it.
People in queerplatonic relationships, more often than not, become the other’s chosen family. They share different aspects of intimacy, like cuddling, hugging, kissing, sharing mundane chores, sharing a bed, raising a child together. The possibilities are endless.

Why does it have “queer” in the name?
These relationships are often found in the queer community. It is especially helpful for asexual people who wish for meaningful relationships outside the traditional conventions of romance. Though it is predominantly queer (for a reason), it does not mean that cisgendered and heterosexual people are banned altogether from having this kind of relationship! It is perfectly alright to explore, and if you have queer friend, it might be worth exploring a queerplatonic relationship with them.
Why are they so amazing?
The reason why queerplatonic connections are so beautiful is because they can be defined by the people involved in them. There is no fixed template as to what this relationship looks like. You and your partner(s) can decide your boundaries, define your bond together, and redefine it if you need! And there is nothing to worry about if the nature of your relationship appears to change. Maybe a romance builds up in the course of living together, and that’s perfectly alright. Maybe there are ups and downs. Maybe one of your partners wants something different, unlike you. Queerplatonic relationships are to be handled just like any other relationship – with care and communication.
Something to note…
As mentioned earlier, asexual people often enter queerplatonic relationships due to strong emotional bonds they build with someone. However, asexuality is a spectrum, and not all asexual individuals choose to be involved in such relationships.
So, this Valentine’s Day, celebrate, knowing that love can come in different forms, shapes, and sizes!
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